Hello, I’m ICE the Host.
Today I want to tell you a story about my life. I was born and raised by my Mother. I never know my father, she always told me that he died when I was only 2 years old. I never question anything because I was young and still doesn’t understand most of the secrets of life anyway.
I sorta have to mature faster than most of my friends because of my working mom. I was living comfortably not rich, just enough. We have some ups and downs too like I almost can’t continue my education because my mom haven’t get any job, or just eat once a day, making juice at night and selling it at the market the next day.. It was hard I know my mom was super exhausted about it. My mom actually always told me everything and anything, we didn’t have any secrets between us. Well that’s what I thought…
Let’s skip to when I was 12 years old.
I worked as a singer since I was in 4th grade of elementary school. I really love to sing and dance, it makes me happy. But singing as a job it’s not always fun. I have to be perfect all the time for any performance and the training was hard. We’re going to have a big opera coming up so it was tough, real tough. I have to be at the place since 8am to 9pm just for the rehearsal almost every day for the whole month. I’m exhausted physically and mentally. It’s like the Universe is playing with me when I also found out the truth about my father. He’s alive somewhere and I’m just an unwanted child. My mom tried to abort me twice, everything just clash my head feels like it’s gonna explode.
And I did explode, finally I said,
“I can’t take this anymore I just want it to end I’m tired, I just want to die.” While crushing a glass bottle with my bare hands until it bleed.
My first suicide attempt at age of 12, it didn’t succeeded because my singing teacher help me regain my sanity. My mom doesn’t know anything about this.
And our bond begun to shattered since that day.
Alter's 